KarMel Scholarship 2005

“A Night to Remember”

By Ashley Ford

Desciption of Submission: “Taking a same-sex date to prom.” - Ashley

Sometimes the most seemingly normal everyday events in our life are of greatest importance. For me, prom was one of these occasions. Being a gay youth in a small town is dangerous enough, but showing up to a very public and traditionally heterosexually dominated event with someone of the same gender could be an even greater risk.

I clearly remember the moment when Ashley, my date, emerged from the bedroom, slinking shyly into the living room, bathed in warm, natural lighting that filtered in from the gossamer curtains. The floor length red-orange evening gown that she wore was simple, yet elegant, and it accentuated her dark complexion nicely. Her eyes were an enigma to me, shallow pools that reflected the excitement and nervousness we both seemed to feel. I took her by the hand, slipping the delicate peach corsage that I had bought for the occasion onto her wrist. She turned to me slowly, and it was as if time stood still for that one moment.

My date sat near me as my sister fixed my hair and makeup, observing my slow metamorphosis from the very practical, somewhat unfeminine girl she had grown used to seeing into an elegant, graceful-looking woman. I remember my mother’s shocked expression as I appeared in the doorway of the kitchen, dressed in my long black formal gown with hair and makeup finished. “Oh my goodness, you actually look like a girl,” she joked, collapsing into a fit of laughter.

A few friends of ours arrived shortly thereafter. We were impressed by how classy our friend Tom looked in his black and white tuxedo, a stark contrast to his very casual nature. My mother took this extraordinary opportunity to see just how many photos she could take. “This took me fifteen minutes to do!” Tom commented in between snapshots. After being thoroughly blinded by a constant stream of flashes, we were ready to go on our way.

Upon arriving at Oakhill Mansion, my stomach began to turn. I shut the car off and stepped out, taking my date’s hand and bracing myself for the worst. We sat down to eat dinner among a small group of our friends, and at that point there were very few people at the venue. The tranquility of the classical music that poured from the speakers near our table seemed to mock my apprehension about the events that were to occur after we finished eating. As our waiter served our meals all I could do was nibble on a piece of bread and push the food around my plate, perhaps due to the unappetizing aroma or the anxiety I was feeling. Soon, though, the plates were cleared and it was time to go outside and be formally announced.

One by one the couples were called and the crowd dissipated, and my date and I began to think that, as to not create controversy, we would be announced last, when everyone else was already in the building and the parents had driven away. With a few couples left, though, the announcer raised the microphone to his mouth, appearing puzzled by the names on the card. He scanned the crowd as if looking for whoever was playing this prank, but after a long moment he awkwardly stumbled through our names, lacking the vigor with which he announced the couples preceding us. “Ashley Ford, and… Ashley Cutter,” he finally managed, and my date took my hand, guiding me to the red carpet leading to the entrance.

We started our long walk down the runner and instead of the harsh glares we were used to, we were greeted with friendly smiles and clapping from the onlookers. As I looked over at Ashley, she was beaming with pride, and I grinned at her, squeezing her hand. As we reached the doorway she hugged me tightly and we were both lit up with smiles.

The soothing classical music that had accompanied our dinner was replaced with a pulsing pop song as we entered the dining room. “I think what you two are doing is so amazing,” a friend of ours, who is also gay, said as he approached. That was all it took to push us into our next bold move.

A slow song began to play and Ashley and I moved to the edge of the dance floor. I inhaled deeply, but the stale air that hung over us was like a blazing fire that scorched my lungs. I could feel my date begin to tremble as she raised her arms around my neck, and I noticed a trace of uncertainty as I rested my hands against her hips. Her eyes drifted about like timid butterflies searching for an amiable face in the crowd. Gradually they landed back at me, where they happily lingered for the remainder of the song. As the last slow, resounding tones of the songs faded I grabbed her hand and led her back to our table.

Many in the gay community worry about the disturbance they will cause by openly displaying their orientation. That night Ashley and I were received with such a positive reaction that it sparked many others to wish they had taken whom they had originally wanted to take. Though we were not the first same-sex couple and will not be the last, we opened the doors for many others to take their same-sex dates without fear.

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